For Matrimonial Purposes by Kavita Daswani

I really cannot describe the story or plot of this book. There really isn’t any. So here’s the blurb from behind the book.

Anju wants a husband. Equally important, her entire family wants Anju to have a husband. Her life in Bombay, where a marriage can be arranged in a matter of hours, is almost solely devoted to this quest, with her anxious mother hauling her from holy site to holy site in order to consult and entreat swamis and astrologers. As Anju’s twenties slip away, she’s fast becoming a spinster by her culture’s standards.

Only then is she able to persuade her parents to allow her to move to New York, where, she hopes, she will not be viewed as a failure. Making a new life, alone, will be hard, but if the stars align, she may even find love-on her own terms.

Anju is born in a family in Bombay-India, where girls are supposed to get married the moment they cross their teens. Or at least the search for a prospective bridegroom should begin. She is hauled to many get-togethers, be it a marriage, a sangeet, a post-marriage party or an engagement, for this is where Indian girls and their parents supposedly HUNT for grooms.

The perfect boy is the one who has a good job, good family, does not have any bad habits, is rich and yes, is obviously an Indian. All the girls want to marry her handsome brothers because they are rich and good looking. It’s basically an endless parade of arranged marriage meetings for Anju and her family.

As Anju turns 26 and is still un-unmarried, she decides to go to New York to study. And she stays on after studies to work and finally becomes a fashion publicist. But still behind all that success is her failure of finding a suitable boy and fulfilling her parent’s wishes. She tries all sorts of things, putting herself out there, trying on-line sites and so on without any positive outcome.

Okay, I guess my tone is a little sarcastic here, that’s not because I did not like the book. I did. In fact I think Kavita Daswani is a good writer with a good sense of humour. The endless efforts that her parents make to get her married are hilarious. And her mother’s worries about her growing age are equally funny. In fact, I liked the sense of humour in the book quite a bit.

‘But beti, look at your age! You’re not twenty-two anymore. You’re not going to get proposals like Nina and Namrata. There aren’t so many boys still unmarried who are older than you. Maybe he’s not perfect, but atleast he’s like you. Elderly type.”

What I didn’t like about the book? It was the carpet statements that suggested that all Indian girls get married when they turn 20. All Indian girls look for rich and handsome husbands. Nobody marries out of love. All the married Indian girls do not work and the only worry they have is from where to hire the third maid. That all Indian husbands do not passionately love their wives. And so on.

I mean hello? What century were you living in? I actually checked back to see what year this book was written in. 2003. That’s not quite old is it? And for God’s sake she lived in Mumbai. If it was a story set in a village I wouldn’t have disagreed. But this was a little too over the top.

I am not denying that arranged marriages are still prevalent in India. I am just denying the fact that all marriages are arranged. Not that there is anything wrong in an arranged marriage. I know perfectly and totally happy couples whose marriages are arranged.

She doesn’t say all these things directly, but the way she has described all the people in the book certainly suggests that. I wouldn’t have been so irritated if she would have kept this specifically related to her circle of friends. But statements that start with ‘All Indian girls…’ made me cringe.

That I have to say spoiled most of the book for me. BUT…it’s a good book. People who know nothing about Indian culture or who don’t care what image she has created will like the book. It’s hilarious with fun adventures of her arranged marriage efforts. And yes, also how in the end she manages to kind of live in the moment and finally finds happiness in a man and a marriage…apparently on her own terms.

By the way, I think that’s a pretty book cover.